Another New Year, another year to change and to make changes.

“A New Year, a time to change and to make changes”        

           As I write this it’s almost the end of the first day of a new year. A time where people make resolutions for weight loss, better relationships, better attitudes. But all through the past year how many have kept it? Not many.  So why keep making a promise to yourself when you know you won’t be able to keep it?

            Over the past couple of weeks or months I’ve seen nothing but a lot of drama towards fellow brothers or sisters in Christ. Why do we have so much resentment towards others when we are supposed to love one another as Christ loved us? Does anyone think that Jesus went around the earth holding grudges to those who offended him? No, He went around loving and healing all that were oppressed. So what is the heart of all the drama? What continues to fuel the very thing that rips friendships apart? There are many things like maybe your friend has a friend that you hate, and because you don’t like their friends than you’ll hold back. Or another one like relationships, now this is a big one and I’ll take some time with it. I’m currently reading a book called “I kissed dating goodbye” by Joshua Harris, and everything in that book so far has changed the way I look at a relationship.
           The book isn’t about never dating, it’s about changing the way you look at relationships to where its God centered and focused on a God kind of love. Instead of looking at a girl with the intent of dating and having physical relations with, it talks about centering a relationship off of friendship. I hear people say that it would be weird to marry your best friend, but isn’t it better to marry you best friend than a total stranger? When dating its mostly fast paced, no time to get to know each other. No time to learn each other’s likes or dislikes passions or desires. There’s no time to learn about the person and to study who you’re with. Dating and relationships are like a big test. If you don’t study for them you’ll fail. Just like if you don’t take time to get to know someone before you’re with them you’ll fail. There will just be two people trying to pick up pieces and starting over. Or in a relationship you may be studying but more on the physical side. The book talks a lot about physical purity and how high God holds it. You may have not ran all the bases as people say but the Bible says that even if you look at a woman with lust, you’ve already committed adultery in your heart. |

    So through what you’ve read so far, how many of you have resentment or drama towards someone else because of a relationship? There is way too much of this going on in the body of Christ, and even at my college. I came here with a focus of God and only God, but it’s so easy to get sucked into this guy is with this girl, and this girl wants the same guy. Or there’s five guys wanting one girl. It’s ridiculous really how people can bring up judgment and drama towards another when they are jealous. I don’t mean to say that I’m perfect because I’ve done the same thing. But honestly I got tired of it, I got so caught up in that that I lost my main focus on coming to Charis. I told everyone that I didn’t know what my problem was but inside I knew. I got to the point where I was driving home one night crying out to God and telling Him that I rather be in His will and single for the rest of my life than be in a relationship and be out of His will. That’s a little extreme and I know that that’s not what God has in mind for me but I know I needed to give all of that to God and let Him know once again that I want to be sold out for Him, I want to earn my full inheritance here on earth. I needed to admit my wrong and give my passion to Him. God gave us all a free will to do whatever we want, but we need to set that aside and say God lead me, I’ll follow. You are the driver and I’ll sit in the back and do what I need to do to get to where you want me to go. We will stumble, we will reach forward and grab the wheel and crash. But God is there waiting for us to climb out of the rubble no matter how serious, get into a brand new car and keep going. I told someone the other day that I rather have a bunch of sisters in Christ than a bunch of memories I’d wished I could forget. I rather have the good out way the bad. I wonder what most people’s reason for going to Charis is. Is it to have relationships with the opposite sex, or is it to truly have a relationship with Christ? I rather look back at my time at Charis and see good things, not a bunch of bad feelings and memories. I’m not making a resolution for the right relationship with a girl, I’m going to leave that up to God. I’m not making any resolution this year, I’m only shifting my focus towards God over a relationship. I know that once I’m ready for a relationship the right one will come, but until I can keep my focus on God while being with a girl it won’t ever work. 

        

            Thanks again for reading what I have to say. I hope that people can take some stuff to heart. You don’t have to agree with everything I say, but I hope it changes the way you look at how things can affect everyone. And that if a relationship takes your focus off God, then it’s either too early or just not Gods plan. Hope you all have a great new year! God Bless!